FEATURED POEM: MATTHEW TUCKNER
Livestream
Yellowstone National Park
I watch schools of salmon
lend themselves with pleasure
to the mouths of grizzly bears
when everything that’s supposed to sit
circled quietly around me starts shouting,
the fat brick of hash
I told my friend not to let me keep,
not even if I kowtow at the knees for it,
the pair of garish rotisserie chickens
peppered with rosemary gossiping
in the fridge, the little stipples of spinach
I bestow gorgeous honorifics upon
before they’re sluiced from my teeth
& swept down the drain.
It’s when the video teems, buffers,
& leaps forward in time, losing time
as it moves, that I misplace the bear
I had come to love for the way
she carries what remains of the fish
after they’ve been fleeced
of meat notched in her auburn fur
like gaudy opals. Falling for
how she lumbered & caterwauled, lifting
her snout to goad whatever wind the river
carried with it, I felt myself, much like
the thin-beaked heron entering the water
without breaking the water, shocked
at how easily I can sneak through this life.
The dolly cants the camera & the camera
cants my eye past the blotch of vetch
blurred on the shoreline, yards beyond
the center of the lens, just another perennial
I’d find listing & losing its color
in my mother’s garden. Foraging for
my bear by the strings of bone
that bangle the thick muscle of her wrists,
I wonder what the lens would find
if it spun around & racked its focus:
the way I bump my snout up against a big
green button when it’s feeding time,
how I lick my coat until it sparkles
& I can finally purr myself to sleep.
When I was kept in a cage
because I couldn’t gather language
to cradle the reasons I wanted to leap
into the mouth of a beast
that would catch & destroy me,
my mother sent missives
repeating be good & don’t die,
among other dreadful spondees.
When the lock was unlatched,
& a clear, blue sky pinned my pupils,
I should’ve been better, I will
get better, I still say, a sentence
I scan for its stresses, finding nothing
but my plain as bone sadness.
It would be wise to ape the species of duck
I don’t know the name of, that floats
past the bears it confuses for hills,
hopscotches between slipstreams of blood,
ducks its bill below the surface,
& slides down the long arc of a waterfall.
I push my face flush against the screen
to glimpse the better place it’s tumbled to
when a window pops up & tells me I can have
twenty more minutes, but only if I pay for it.
Matthew Tuckner is a writer from New York. He is currently an MFA candidate in Creative Writing at NYU where he is Poetry Editor of Washington Square Review and teaches in the Undergraduate Writing Program. He is the recipient of a University Prize from the Academy of American Poets, the winner of the 2022 Yellowwood Poetry Prize, a finalist for the inaugural Prufer Poetry Prize, and a Best New Poets and Best of the Net nominee. His poems have appeared or are forthcoming in 32 Poems, Copper Nickel, Colorado Review, Pleiades, Nashville Review, The Missouri Review, Bennington Review, Bat City Review, and Four Way Review, among others.